And, I Loved You
by XxLady ClassicismxX
Summary: "Because you loved him." Mikan looked up, her hazel eyes watering, "I-If this is l-love, then I-I want n-no part of it!" She sobbed, tears streaming down her windblown cheeks, "H-Hotaru… Please... Please, I can't live like this. J-Just end it for me already!"


**A/N: Hello, my fellow readers. As an acknowledgement and small thank you to the support and reviews I received on my very first fanfiction, I decided to compose a short one-shot based on not one, but two of my favorite animes. **

**I'm well aware that some of you might not be all too familiar with **_**Hunter x Hunter**_**, but I think you won't necessarily need any background on that anime as I will do my best to convey the characters' personalitites and such. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own **_**Gakuen Alice**_**, **_**Hunter x Hunter**_**, or any of the characters. I bet many of us wish that we did though, however. **

**This is my first oneshot, and hopefully I did alright.**

* * *

><p><em><strong>Prepare yourself for quite a bit of OOCness.<strong>_

* * *

><p><strong>~ Oneshot ~<strong>

"Remind me again why we're supposed to be… enemies, in a way?"

Popping a piece of chocolate into his mouth, the other figure shrugged, grinning, "Enemies? Nah, more like different… races, you know? I mean like, you know full well…" shrugging again, he shifted from one leg to the other, his eyes narrowed slightly as he tossed his gun into the air, catching it repeatedly.

A twinkling laugh. "Hm, I suppose so," removing her mask, she shook her head, allowing the long chestnut tresses to tumble onto her shoulders. She fiddled with a red-hilted switchblade, "Ne, Killua do you suppose—"

"Mikan Sakura, where the _hell_ are you?" a gruff voice bellowed, "We're heading out, hurry up!'

Killua smirked and popped another piece of chocolate into his mouth, mouthing _Be the good girl your daddy wants you to be_ while toying with the handgun he held.

The brunette froze for a split second before answering smoothly, "Give me a moment, Rei! I'll be there immediately!" Turning, she stuck out her tongue at the latter figure leaning lazily against a tree. Lowering her voice, she muttered fiercely, "Serio is _not _my _Daddy. _He's just some guy who happens to be my… mentor or whatever!" Pausing slightly, she continued, grinning, "See you six days from now, midnight, the cave. And jeez, tell Illumi to stop hiding, it's getting annoying." Whirling around swiftly, she vanished into the darkness.

.

Once the brunette disappeared into the night, Killua's smirk was replaced with a malevolent scowl. Pushing off the tree trunk, he stuffed the chocolates into his pocket. Silver hair falling over his eyes, Killua muttered, "Show yourself, you bastard. I don't have time for your damned games."

A silhouette emerged from the shadows, "What, you aren't pleased to see your own brother?" the voice chuckled.

A smirk highlighting his features, Killua replied, "Not at all, _brother_. When you see the old man, tell him to come on his own terms. I don't need you being his guinea pig."

"My, my, sharp, are we? That girl was intelligent too. Who was she?"

The silver-haired lad just shrugged, his back facing his brother, "You'd know if you arrived a bit earlier," he replied impassively. "What do you need?"

"Oh, nothing much, Killua _dear_. We're just going to _assist_ the government in the killing of a few criminals. Nothing major."

Killua arched an eyebrow in annoyance, "That's not all you came for, _Illumi_."

"My, what a sharp little brother I have. That's good. The other thing? We're also treating the Yukihara family as a little… _pre-game fun_. Old man's orders." With that, Illumi turned to leave.

"Wait."

"Hm?"

"The Yukihara family?" he demanded coolly.

Illumi just shrugged, "Something old man said about a tangerine or something. Her parents and uncle are causing a hell lot of trouble anyway; might as well kill their daughter too. I really couldn't care," he said smoothly. Pausing, he nodded at Killua, "You, old man, myself, and a few others will be there." Brushing back his long hair, he turned to leave once again

"Old man's orders?"

Illumi nodded in annoyance, dark brows furrowing together, "I just said that, little brother."

"I'm not doing it," Killua said indifferently.

Illumi cocked an eyebrow, "There will be no such thing. And that's final."

"I'll have you know, that the Yukiharas are just pests. They aren't worth our time."

"Our time? Killua," his brother mocked, "exactly as you said, they are _pests_. All the more to get rid of them."

"Worthless pests, at that," Killua breathed, lying effortlessly, "They'll be killed when the time comes. Don't waste your time."

"Kil, you do know that the Yukiharas aren't merely _pests_. Getting rid of them will be no easy feat. Stop acting like such a brat."

Killua smirked, "A brat? Then why's a brat holding our deepest secrets? Why should _I_, of all people, follow along with your and old man's orders?"

"Killua, that's enough. Two weeks from now, Kukuroo Mountain." With that, Illumi vanished.

_Kukuroo Mountain, huh? As if I'm going back to that stupid excuse for a home. _

**~…~...~…~**

Strolling out of the thicket absentmindedly. Lost in his musings, he arrived at an alley. Leaning against a brick wall casually, he crossed his arms, closing his eyes.

"I'll be there, you know. There's also been a change of plans. "

Snapped from his thoughts, Killua looked to the side. Striding towards him in the dark was a rather tall girl with jet-black hair that reached her shoulders. She was dressed in dark leather denims and a leather jacket, matched with a pair of knee-high boots; several handguns were strapped to her side, highlighting her air of authority and elegance. Large amethyst eyes blinking slowly in the moonlight, she gazed at him in boredom.

"Nice to see you again too, Imai," Killua drawled, grinning.

The girl nodded indifferently, she stated monotonously, "You're going through with it."

Killua shrugged unconcernedly, "Perhaps."

"Battling with yourself won't help, you know, Zoldyck."

Killua scowled in annoyance. _Like hell I'd kill Mikan. _Changing the topic smoothly, he jerked his head towards the ebony-haired girl, "You're not one known for joy visits. What are you doing here?"

Imai shrugged mindlessly, closing the gap between them. Standing right in front of him, she stared at him straight in the eye, "You weren't willing to follow through with your father's plans."

"Hell, no. Of course not."

"Exactly as Illumi initially thought," Imai nodded.

Killua's eyes narrowed. Nodding slowly, he cocked his head to the side.

"Your family. They—"

"—Killed the Yukiharas. Right?" he snarled softly, maintaining a steady voice.

Impassive eyes glued to Killua's, she nodded, "Exactly."

"How about—"

"You know as well as I do that she's alive," Hotaru said softly, keeping her eyes distant.

Killua nodded, his silver bangs falling in front of his face, "That's all that matters." Turning to leave, Imai's voice stopped him.

"Don't kill anyone, Zoldyck." Tossing him a black object, she nodded in satisfaction as he caught it with ease. "I only said don't _kill_. Until you're dead sure." With a glint in her lavender eyes, Imai was gone.

* * *

><p><strong>From: IceQueen<strong>

**To: CatEyeZ**

**10:56pm**

_**It was a mistake. Illumi lied. They're still out there.**_

* * *

><p>"You're here," Killua nodded, grinning.<p>

The brunette shrugged, "I was the one who decided it anyway," she said, throwing in a grin that matched Killua's. "Besides, it's been nearly a week since I last saw you. Hey, hand over those chocolates."

Grinning cheekily, the boy, clad in nothing but a dark turtleneck and shorts smirked, held the chocolates just out of Mikan's reach.

The girl pouted, lunging once more, unsuccessfully, at the withheld chocolate. "Killua! You big meanie!" Tackling him to the floor, she nearly snatched the chocolates away when Killua ended up on top of her, smirking. "Eep!" Tilting her head to the side, Mikan wreathed away, successfully stealing the chocolates away from their initial owner. Grinning triumphantly, the brunette happily scarfed down the sweets. Offering the last piece to Killua, she hugged him tightly, beaming from ear to ear as he accepted it without delay.

Sitting together in the cave, a comfortable silence engulfed them.

Breaking the silence, Killua chuckled, "You sure get worked up over chocolates."

"Oh yeah? I bet you'd protect them with your life, you big meanie."

Killua just shrugged, "Eh, perhaps."

"Hey, Killua?"

"Hmm?"

"Why didn't you say anything about my parents' deaths?"

Killua stiffened besides her.

She stood up, "I won't get mad at you, Killua. I'll try not to. I guess it wasn't your fault, right? It wasn't your fault at all… You didn't even know about it until after it happened, huh? That's what Hotaru told me anyway…" She glanced at him as he stood up as well, his hair hanging loosely over his eyes, "Well, I'll take my leave now, it's getting late… Good night, Kill," With that, she picked up her switchblade lying on the floor and crunched quickly across the rocks, leaving Killua alone in the cave.

_People and their emotions... Hell, her parents aren't even dead._

**From: IceQueen**

**To: CatEyeZ**

**1:27am**

_**Told her yet, Z?**_

Killua glanced down at his phone; clicking his tongue at Imai's probing text.

**From: CatEyeZ**

**To: IceQueen**

**1:27am**

_**Didn't **_**you**_** already tell her? Besides, I thought they're still alive**_

Shaking his head, he read Imai's reply.

_**She gave you a chance to tell her. You blew it. **_

_**Her father is dead.**_

Scowling, Killua turned his gaze to the ceiling of the cave. _How was he supposed to know that Mikan was waiting for some stupid explanation?_

His phone buzzed,

_**She trusts you, you know. **_

He punched _**I know **_into the phone and strode slowly out of the cave.

**From: IceQueen**

**To: CatEyeZ**

**1:36am**

_**We need to talk. It's important. Alley Hundred.**_

_Jeez, what is it now? _Upon arriving at his destination, two figures clad in black appeared from the shadows. _Hm, a setup?_ He shrugged to himself. _Nope, just a little interference. _As the two figures came rushing towards him, Killua smirked and lowered his head with his arms outstretched. Within moments, the two individuals landed on the floor with a faint _thump_, paralyzed.

"Ne, Killua?"

Killua inhaled sharply. Turning around halfway, the voice continued, "Sorry I ran out on you earlier. I just…"

Suddenly Killua was in front of her, "Tangerine, _I'm_ sorry. I shouldn't have kept it from you, but then your Mom is—don't move," he muttered.

Mikan froze, sensing Killua's urgency. She frowned as a bullet whizzed past her right arm. _Don't. Move. _Killua's eyes were commanding her to stay put.

Refusing to obey, Mikan whirled around, running straight towards the shooter.

"Mikan!"

Forgetting everything, Mikan flew at the figure, a frown etched on her face. Dodging the other bullet that flew at her, she flung herself towards the source. Wincing slightly as a bullet grazed her thigh, she tackled the dark figure.

.

Hearing moaning from the ground, Killua lowered his voice, threatening, "If you so much as move a muscle, I will ensure in your death." With that, he heard a heavy _thump_ from Mikan.

Several more figures appeared from above, having leaped down from ladders.

"Ah, it's dessert time," Killua smirked. _Mikan, hold out for as long as you can. You got this._ Rubbing his hands together, he nodded casually at the men surrounding him, "Evenin', gentlemen," he drawled. With that, Killua spun into a tornado, paralyzing and striking them unconscious. Not once did he have to pull the trigger.

_Sweet dreams_.

_Clap. Clap. Clap._ "Nice work, Zoldyck. Not bad. For taking my advice, of course."

"Imai, you're late. It's getting annoying. Someone interfered," he shrugged, "Wouldn't be worth it, killing them. Just yet."

Imai nodded, "Indeed. _She's_ alive. I don't trust you, but I will work with you." _For Mikan_. Imai nodded at the struggling brunette down the alleyway, "Might as well go play Hero for now. _The storm is coming, Zoldyck,_" she warned. With that, she was gone.

_And Tangerine calls you her best friend? _Shaking his head, he strolled towards the brunette, pulling an uncaring façade.

Nearing them, his eyes widened when heard the brunette's soft, angry voice.

.

The alleyway was dark, the only source of light was the moon shrouded in fog.

Restraining the figure in black against the ground in the dark alleyway, Mikan pinned him against the floor with her legs. Thrusting the gun away, she ripped off the assaulter's mask. Her eyes widened, a mixture of surprise and disgust.

Finding her voice, Mikan whispered, "Y-Yuka? I thought y-you were d-dead!"

"Well hello, _sweetheart_. So we meet again. Expecting a man, were we?" the woman asked coyly.

"Don't. Call. Me. That." Gritting her teeth in abhorrence, Mikan strained her ears as she practically _heard_ Killua's confident smirk somewhere down the long alleyway.

Taking advantage of Mikan's wavering attention, Yuka gave a forceful shove, knocking Mikan to the ground. "Lesson Number One: Always focus on the enemy," she smirked.

Rolling back to her feet quickly, Mikan shrugged, "I know. Thank you anyway though. _Mother_. I'll be sure to remember." With that, she lunged at Yuka once more.

"I may have taught you well, but you'll never excel me," Yuka taunted, dodging Mikan's grasp easily.

"Oh yeah, Yuka? Try me," Mikan growled. The brunette gasped, falling to her knees. Clutching her stomach, she uttered a groan, coughing.

"Unlucky, are we, _Tangerine_? We can end this today, you know. We can." Yuka sneered, "Get up, you child. I didn't give birth to a daughter who can't get a grip of herself. But again, what kind of a daughter are you, running off, leaving home, and going off on your own? " She picked up her gun, raising an eyebrow, "Not so talkative anymore, are we? Come on _Mikan_," Yuka strode towards her slowly, continuing to taunt her.

_Come on, Yuka. Just a little closer, one more step—_

Unleashing her fury, Mikan leapt to her feet, knocking the gun out of her mother's hands. Tackling Yuka against a wall, Mikan refused to loosen her grasp on her mother. "You have _never_ been a mother to me, Yuka," she spat, "Why couldn't you have waited until when I was completely alone? You just had to pull the damned pistol in _front of my friend. _I may have your traits, I may have your blood running in my veins, but I also have something _you_ don't have, and will _never_ have." Staring straight into her mother's eyes, Mikan whispered, "I have _honor_. I have pride. And I know love."

Yuka glared at Mikan. "What do you know of love? And honor? Oh please. You just _tackled_ me to the ground," she snarled. Twisting free from her daughter's grasp, Yuka whipped out a hidden gun. Gripping it tightly, she pointed it at Mikan, "And what do _you_ know of love?" she repeated. "Is the love you feel _true_?" She pressed the gun to Mikan's head. Hissing, she whispered, "Enough love… to die for it? Will you die for the one you love?"

Mikan swallowed, her heart palpitating in her chest. Tears shining in her eyes, she kept her gaze on her mother, not trusting herself to speak.

"You kill her, you'll have to kill me first." A cool voice said. _Killua._

Yuka gasped, dropping her gun in surprise. "K-Killua Z-Zoldyck… CatEyeZ, was it?" she narrowed her eyes. "What are you doing here, you bastard?"

"Simple. To kill you. You never were dead, were you?" It wasn't a question.

Yuka laughed haughtily, "Of course. I'm not amazing for nothing. Hell, you wouldn't dare to kill me, Zoldyck. You're too fond of _someone_ to just _kill_ me," she coughed, "Besides, you'll get caught, and interrogated. Over, and over, again, and again. Who knows what will ha—"

"Shut up, hag," Killua interrupted lazily. "Any words of farewell? Any last prayers? Maybe some apologies are in order."

Yuka scowled, "You wouldn't dare to kill me in front of my _daughter_."

"Oh, but she isn't here, _Yukihara_."

Yuka's eyes widened. "H-How did you—"

"It was simple, Yuka. _Yukihara_."

"But my daughter, she's also Yukihara, and—"

"She's long gone, Yukihara. I made sure of it," Killua shrugged nonchalantly.

"Don't worry, I don't play dirty," _Unlike you_, "We're ending this here, one-on-one."

In the dawning of the early sunrise, everything seemed tranquil. The only thing that could be heard was the occasional birds' early morning canons, trilling softly in the early morning sun.

A fight broke out between a certain silver-haired lad and a brown-haired woman. Triggers were pulled, curses exchanged, knifes thrown, and the dewdrops on the grass were sprinkled with droplets of scarlet.

At last, a lone shot rang out, stilling the birds' songs, abruptly chilling them into silence.

"_You were supposed to be dead."_

"_I already told you, I managed to survive, you bastard. I never die."_

**.**

"_You're going to re-regret it, Zoldyck."_

"_Oh, good for you, I don't regret anything."_

Burying the woman high in the mountains, deep in the woods, he left, returning to the alleyway. _You may have been the worst of mothers, and the dirtiest of criminals, but you were a living being, Yuka Yukihara. Farewell._

* * *

><p>"So you just <em>killed<em> her?!" Mikan shrieked.

"I did."

Mikan took a deep breath and spun on her heels, storming out of the room, slamming a vase to the ground, waves of relief, surprise, remorse, and love crashing inside her.

.

"_Trust me, you'll just die. All of you will die. And I will watch you all burn in living hell."_

"_And I would like to see you try, _Kuonji_."_

* * *

><p><strong>Yuka Yukihara is dead.<strong>

.

"Just die, you bastard."

Killua just smirked, "I'll win, or die trying. Us lot seem to like to use the word _bastard_ a lot, don't we?"

"A confident, cocky little brat, are _we_?"

Killua said nothing, the confident smirk still etched on his face.

"Just look at yourself," Gesturing at Killua's body, the man continued, "You're bruised and bloodied. Hell, you're even wearing shorts. How you withstood those fucking bullets, I don't know. You'll die trying? I will gladly make sure you live up to that."

Killua stared at the man straight in the eye, "I'm not a coward like you." _I can, and will, withstand limits._

"And what the _hell_ are you doing, Kuonji?" —_to_ _Killua? _Aiming her gun at the man, Mikan narrowed her eyes.

Kuonji chuckled, "Catch me if you can, my little girl." Turning, the man leapt away.

"Coward," she growled. As a chase broke out, the killing around them only increased. Men and women alike were fighting, engaged in hand-to-hand combat, gruesome deaths being witnessed.

.

Kuonji sneered at Mikan, running a dirty hand through his hair, "Enjoy your rest, _Killua_." Smirking, he pulled the trigger and rammed a knife into Killua's back, dropping him to the ground. _Ave atque vale_, "Hail and farewell, Killua Zoldyck."

Kuonji wrestled Mikan to the ground, "So the little girl finally comes running," he scorned, "How touching." He licked his lips, running his tongue across the blood dripping down his mouth. Face smeared with filth and blood, Mikan grit her teeth in disgust, "Love the silver boy, don't you? Well, let me tell you, he's dead. _Dead_," he said with singsong.

"Don't you dare talk about Killua like you know him. Don't talk to me like you know _me_," she snarled. "It's time to end our game. To end what _you_ started, Kuonji _Yukihara_. With that, she slammed a fist against the man's face, blind with anger.

"I never, ever, want to see you again! Ever!" Seizing her gun, Mikan steadied her finger on the trigger. Throwing the gun aside, she growled, "We're doing this _my_ way."

.

"With swords? That's outdated, no? What happened to the cute, innocent little Mikan I knew from years ago?" he scoffed, "And where do you plan to get swords anyway, little girl?"

"I already have them." Thrusting a sword into his hands, Mikan held her own blade, eyes glinting with pain, furiousness, and determination.

"You're on, _Tangerine_," with a smirk, Kuonji sprinted at Mikan.

.

"This is for Killua," she snarled. With that, she thrust her blade deep into Kuonji's chest, piercing his core. Penetrating through his back, she embedded the tip of the sword securely into the ground.

Panting, she grimaced, falling to her knees. Refusing to give in to her pain and fatigue, Mikan forced herself to her legs, trembling.

_Killua, Killua, please… _Stumbling towards the figure, Mikan knelt besides the injured boy. Clasping his hand tightly, tears welled up in her eyes, "Killua, I-I'm… I'm so sorry," she whispered.

"Mikan, you're fine… I'm f-fine," he breathed, "I just want for us to," he inhaled quickly, "for us to p-part, on good terms."

"Shh, don't talk, I, j-j-just, just breathe," Mikan whispered, holding him in her arms, ignoring the searing pain in her back, "Y-You're not g-going anywhere. Just—"

"Mikan, please," he winced, "let, let me finish… I know we haven't had… the b-best of," he took a hasty breathe, "Relationships… but t-thank you," inhaling sharply, he repeated, "Thank you. For being t-there for me," he whispered.

"Oh Killua… Killua, I never did h-hate y-you, I couldn't," She murmured. At a loss for words, Mikan gazed down at him softly, running her fingers through his now-dirty silver hair. "And no… it wasn't m-me… Thank _you_."

Staring into one another's eyes, hazel eyes gazed at blue ones fondly; azure eyes gazed into coffee ones softly, affectionately.

Mustering his last ounce of strength, Killua forced a small, reassuring smile as he shook his head faintly, "Farewell, tangerine blossom. And… _Stay gold_." Eyelids closing slowly, Killua breathed a silent sigh and went still.

"What? No, Killua! Killua!" Shaking the boy frantically, tears spilled down her cheeks, "Come on, Killua… you're going to live, wake up. Damn it, Killua!" Hugging him close, she shook his body in vain.

"K-Killua…" Mikan stood up numbly, forgetting the pain threatening to throw her towards the ground.

Taking in her surroundings, she hitched a breath. Scattered all around were the bodies of her dead comrades, still armed with weapons and firearms; never to see another living daylight, never to see their loved ones again. The grass about them was splattered with blood; the once-beautiful mountain now stained, and tainted. Discarded weapons lay amongst the dead wildflowers and soiled earth. _And yet… it was so beautiful… Damn this stupid mountain, this goddamned brawl, everything is so darned stupid._ _If… If it weren't for me, no one would be hurt. Everyone would still be alive. But… _Mikan balled her scratched hands into fists, another round of tears streaming down her injured cheeks. She looked back at Killua's lifeless form. Without thinking twice, she ran back to his body, kneeling besides him once again. Shaking, she brushed her fingers against his stilled heart. _Killua…_ Mikan gazed at him for what seemed like eternity. _Killua… you can have all the girls you like now. Ne?_

**~. ~. ~**

Night fell. Wolves' lonesome howls could be heard from miles away. But a certain brunette was stilling bowed over the body of her dead comrade, keeping vigil.

The sun peaked over the horizon, disappearing into the clouds soon after.

"If you keep moping, who knows what Zoldyck would do if he were alive."

Mikan bent her head as a new wave of tears threatened to fall. "Hotaru… W-Why does it h-hurt so much?" Mikan wailed aloud, "Why?!"

"Because you loved him."

Mikan looked up, her hazel eyes watering, "I-If this is l-love, then I-I want n-no part of it!" She sobbed, tears streaming down her windblown cheeks, "H-Hotaru… Please... Please, I can't live like this. J-Just end it for me already!"

Hotaru stayed silent, her eyes slightly widened, holding an air of superiority, her knuckles white from gripping the gun in her hand. Her lavender eyes softened as she watched the brunette place a soft, chaste kiss upon Killua's lips.

_Killua… I… _Mikan entwined her fingers in his silvery hair. _Farewell, Killua._ Pressing her _M_ pendant into the palm of his scarred hand, she stood up shakily. "I… I want to… I want to bury him," she uttered softly, keeping her head down, "I want to bury Killua." Looking up at her best friend, Mikan shook her tears away, the pain she felt masked by the determined glint in her eyes.

Hotaru nodded stoically, releasing her hold on her gun and strapping it onto her waist. Digging the heels of her boots into the earth, she walked over to Mikan and placed a silent, reassuring hand on her shoulder. Violet eyes meeting hazel ones, a small smile tugged at Mikan's lips. _Thank you, Hotaru. Thank you for being there for me._

"Keep that smile on your face for as long as you can, Mikan. It doesn't mean that just because you're so stupid, you shouldn't keep smiling."

Tearing up again, Mikan embraced her friend tightly, "Hotaru, I love you so, so much!"

Patting Mikan's back consolingly, Hotaru smiled faintly, whispering softly, "That's what friends are for, right?"

Mikan nodded into Hotaru's neck, "How uncharacteristic of you, Hotaru," she joked softly. Pausing, she whispered, "Ne, H-Hotaru… I, I'm going to miss h-him…"

Turning around silently, Hotaru nodded in understanding as she strode away, assorted contraptions strapped to her waist.

"Killua," Mikan murmured softly, "I… I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Sorry for not always being there for you, s-sorry for walking out on you when I got up-upset… Sorry f-for, for e-everything." Her only answer was a faint wind swirling around her, tugging gently at the long, auburn hair.

* * *

><p>Mikan stood in the woods, shivering in the morning mist. She stared at the spot where her mother allegedly lay.<p>

"M-Mom?" Mikan molded the word on her tongue, unsure of what to say. "So… what an untimely death, huh?" Mikan stared at her mother's name. "You could have been an amazing mother. And perhaps a h-happy one at that… And yet you turned to crime, and… disorder. You could have had everything. You know? And yet you threw it all away, branding yourself as a sly, badass delinquent. You taught me well, though, however…"

Sighing softly, Mikan murmured, "But Mom, I guess I still love you… in a way. You may be dead, you may have been horrible but… you'll always be my mother. I'll never be able to change that." _Wherever you are, I hope you're happy now. _

Shivering, the brunette wandered away from her mother's resting place. Leaves of crimson danced from their places in the trees as squirrels and chipmunks scurried about, their cheeks puffed, grabbing whatever they could find. Mikan gazed up at the early morning sun, then at the leaves, mesmerized by their fieriness. She blinked. _Ave atque vale, Mom._

* * *

><p>"Killua? If you can hear me… R-Rest in peace, alright? I'll see you again, o-one day. I, I p-promise. You'll wait for me, right Killua?" Smiling gently, she wiped furiously at her eyes, determined not to cry. Refusing to let her smile falter, Mikan placed a gloved hand on Killua's gravestone, "You'll always be right by my side, won't you? It doesn't mean that if you're d-de—gone, you aren't… you aren't there, ne, Killua?"<p>

Shifting in her leather pants, Mikan knelt down, coming face to face with Killua's headstone.

_Here lies Killua Zoldyck _

_Year Unknown—November 12__th__, 2014_

Mikan shook her head, tracing the characters repeatedly, "No one knows your birth year? Jeez, Killua," she laughed faintly, "There isn't a, a person who actually knows you, huh?" _1999._ "Well hm… at least you finished off all those… criminals. You're practically a hero in the news, you know…?"Silently shifting into a laying position on the grass, Mikan gazed at the sky in wonder. It was a beautiful sunset – the pastel-blue sky was a fiery blend of orange, yellow, and soft red. A few birds could be heard, twittering at one another, savoring the last moments of sunlight.

"Ne, Killua, if only you could see this sky, it's," she paused, smiling, "it's ethereal, and the little birds..."

As the sun disappeared under the horizon, Mikan exhaled and hoisted herself onto her legs.

"'_Nature's first green is gold,_

_Her hardest hue to hold,_

_Her early leaf's a flower,_

_But only so an hour._

_Then leaf subsides to leaf._

_So Eden sank to grief,_

_So dawn goes down to day._

_Nothing g-gold can stay._'

By Robert Frost… That's you, isn't it, Killua?" Mikan whispered into the air, her mouth curved upwards faintly. "You're present one moment, and gone the next… Isn't that what you meant when you said for me to _'stay gold'_… for me not to "disappear"? To not disappear into winter… Who would have thought that you were one to read poems…? But gold doesn't rust, so doesn't everything g-gold stay…?"

Walking away unsteadily, she stopped short, shoving her hands into her jacket pockets. Lowering her voice, Mikan turned around as she gazed lovingly at the full moon, "And Killua? Thank you for this journey… For everything. Your death may have been partially my fault… But… I did care about you. I really did… _And… I loved you_.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: My dear readers – the silent and active ones alike, thank you for reading this story of mine. I've been working on this for the past few days, and I've been tempted to upload this earlier than Saturday. However, due to a strict Wi-Fi policy at my house, I wasn't able to post this accordingly.**

**The verse mentioned above is **_**Nothing Gold Can Stay**_** by Robert Frost. It may be short, but also happens to be one of my favorite poems. **

_**Ave atque vale**_**— Latin for "Hail and Farewell". 'Ave atque vale' is from Roman poet Gaius Valerius Catullus's elegiac poem, "Catullus 101", dedicated to his brother who was dead.**

**The silver-haired lad – Killua? Yes, he is pretty similar to Natsume Hyuuga, really. But if you've watched Hunter x Hunter, Killua "**_**smiles**_**" more often, and perhaps even deadlier than Natsume. I guess in my little… writing spree, I missed writing about Natsume, so I may have made Killua a bit more… hm, say, badass.**

**I probably **_**did**_** use too much OOCness for Mikan's and Yuka's part, and if you found it unnerving, I apologize for that. If any of you disliked the OOC, then do let me know. As compensation, I might be able to find time to write another oneshot, doing my best to keep everyone as their original characters.**

**One more thing: Does anyone recognize the scene in which Killua dies?**

**Yours truly,**

**XxLady**

_**Alex**_

**If enough people want it, then I might **_**possibly**_** be able to spin a sequel from this in which there will be no more Crossovering— just brief mentions of certain… say, **_**external**_** characters. **

_**So now then, Until Next Time.**_


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